The Gift of Understanding
Jolly Man’s euthanasia was a first for us. After injecting the usual amount of drug for his size, he slowly collapsed. With tears flowing, I lovingly guided his head to the ground.
At this point, horses are unconscious and near death. Within moments, the heart stops and the deed is done, except with Jolly. His heart didn’t stop, and he was moving as though slowly running. I knew he was unconscious and felt no pain, but it was excruciating to watch.
While my husband ran for more solution, I sat flooded in tears with Jolly. In my heart, I knew my decision had been right but agonizing doubt filled me. This memory plagued me for years.
Years later, I was communicating with a client’s broodmare with serious medical issues. Often I’d feel torn between roles as the vet’s wife and the animal communicator. As the vet’s wife, we were all about saving lives. As the communicator, I soon learned that it’s not always about healing the physical.
While my husband was doing everything humanly possible to save this mare’s life, she was telling me she wanted to return to Spirit. I felt her increasing sadness, since her people weren’t listening to her wishes. My allegiance is always with the animal, so I told her if she wanted to transition then she had to create something that couldn’t be healed.
Late the next night, the phone rang. My husband announced that another seizure may have broken the mare’s shoulder. As we rushed to her, I thought about my recent advice. Her shoulder was broken, and she was euthanized immediately.
Secretly, I was happy for her, because I knew her desire to go Home. Astonishingly, the mare needed extra solution to stop her heart and free her soul. As I felt her soul release, I thanked her for the knowledge that I’d made the correct decision years earlier. I felt a burden lift from my heart that I’d been carrying since that sad day. Through this mare, the Universe provided me with the gift of understanding.